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​Finding Each Other Again

We live in a very fast paced society. There are more things to do, more things to remember (besides usernames and passwords), and more people to interact with on a daily basis than ever before. We have various responsibilities to juggle; careers, jobs, children, homes, etc., but it seems there is now something very different, an immense amount of pressure that has been added that wasn’t there before. A 9 to 5 business hour is not so regular for many people working today. With all of our technology, we can now get ahead of the game, get more done, and outdo our competitors. We give up a little sleep, we skip meals, we put exercise off and we only spend time with our spouse and children, when we’re done with our “work”. When is that? When are we done?  What is the wake up call that pulls us off the hamster wheel? For some it may be sheer burnout, mental and physical exhaustion, for others it’s illness, or maybe severe body pain or migraines, that can leave you flat on your back for a few days. Then there’s anxiety and depression, which is at its highest rate ever, and for other’s it’s failing marriages due to neglect. I want to address the latter in this blog and shed some light on caring for your marriage before it becomes a casualty of our times. Most of the time, during seasons of stress and busyness, one of the first things that may be affected is our time with our spouse. We may have to put off date night or relaxing together or having meaningful conversations because “duty” calls. And yes, sometimes we legitimately need to be understanding and supportive during certain seasons, but every season has an ending. We are creatures of habit and though may not recognize it when the season is over we allow it to become the “new norm”. That’s when it becomes an issue. It’s so important to have a standard or value system in place, regarding our relationship; one that we chose to put in place, to keep us on course, and maintain our connection. Here are some I recommend to my clients:

(Send your email address to for a free list of great conversation starters) It doesn’t need to cost a lot. It could be a walk, a long drive, coffee, a quiet dinner, or sometimes encompass a bigger treat like a play, an outing, or a weekend getaway. So money should never be an excuse. Babysitting issues can be dealt with by having alliances with other parents in the same situation, so you can trade off and support one another.

If you are caring for each other and your relationship on a regular basis you are wise. You are keeping it healthy and maintaining your connection so it’s never really lost. Then when busy seasons, trials and hardships come (Matthew 7:25) your relationship will be strong enough to with stand them, and you’ll always find your way back to each other. It can actually feel like despite everything, you made your way home to one another again. Matthew 7:25 … and the rains and wind beat upon that house and it did not fall because it was built upon a rock. (Paraphrased) #rock solid #connection #relationshipgoals #dating #affectionate #sexlife #marriage #rewardscoaching #marriagebuilders

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